"All that is now, and all that is gone, and all that's to come" - Eclipse (Dark Side of the Moon)

Oct 26, 2007
"All that is now, and all that is gone, and all that’s to come"-Eclipse (Dark Side of the Moon
Current mood:thoughtful

Today was a beautiful fall day. This entire week, the weather has been gorgeous, for a Minnesota October.

I took Budha outside a little while ago and I sat at the patio table and looked at the sky. It was absolutely breathtaking. The moon is full. There are many clouds. The clouds are all grey, and separated by bright outlines from the moonglow. My mind went everywhere.

I thought of all these memories - who knows where they came from? It started with the moon. Summer of 2006, Jon called me and said "go outside and look at the moon right now". It was beautiful. A full bloodmoon. Then I started thinking about Virginia. I remembered when Julia and I were living out there. We used to sit on the front steps at night (sometimes for hours) and just talk about EVERYTHING. Families, friends, relationships, tragedies, jokes, whatever... I thought of Brent and Katie and how they used to chase each other around our 5th St apartment and one of them was always wearing a Dr. Suess hat. I remembered the coldest I ever felt was when I was in the 8th grade. I was going to stay the night at my friend, Danielle's house. Little did I know, I would get roped into going with her and her dad to a lady's house in the middle of nowhere, and haul wood into this small little home. The house (more, a cottage) had nothing but books in it - and a toilet in the middle of the room. I don't know what this place was. I don't think I ever knew. It was winter, and it was so cold that the snow would scratch your fingers if you didn't have gloves. After 2 hours I could hardly move my fingers and toes (even dressed appropriately). We were there until dark, and I think the only reason we left was because I couldn't take it anymore. I don't know why that memory struck me. I remember calling "Jenny" (before it was "Jen" or "Jennifer") as soon as I got off the school bus. Even though she got off the bus only 3 minutes before me, we had to spend every day together and meet each other halfway on our bikes. I remember the first time I felt true friends in Duluth. I remember the day a black butterfly flew along side my drivers' side window.That was the day I felt at home. Even though I had lived here for years then; that was the day. I remember, when I found out how important I was in Jon's life. I thought of the first time I played "Operation" with my relatives all from my dad's side of the family and feeling a sense of belonging. I remember when I was little and my oldest brother would babysit me. If I didn't go to bed, he'd turn on scary TV shows (War of the Worlds) until I'd go to bed. I was too scared to even be in the room if it was on. I remember my other brother throwing frogs into the air and saying "Super Frog". I remember my sister and I giggling about nothing at all hours of the night, then when our brother would tell us to be quiet, my parents would yell at him for being loud. HaHaHa. I don't remember much of the last year, but I remember the people who got me through it, and how wonderful they were, and still are. I thought about the show I used to watch when I was little and I think it was called "My Cousin Vikki" - I think. She was a robot. I remember watching "Out of this World" with my mom all the time - about a girl who's dad was an alien and they communicated through what looked like a crystal candy dish. Then I looked at the moon again and remembered when Tom moved to Duluth. I remember looking at a full moon with him too in 2006. I thought about how grateful I am that he's here. He's a fabulous roommate.

Then I came back inside and I thought about "now". I feel pretty good. I'm excited. Things are going well. Work is stressful. All I've ever wanted (aside from good pay of course) is recognition. I'm finally getting it. I've worked for it, and people see that. Budha is happy. Everything is going well. I've recently met someone whose thoughts intrigue me. Which make my own thoughts....intrigue myself. Hmmm....Julia....this goes along with the "question" theory we've been discussing. On that note, this blog is done. Thoughts came at me in a herd, all in about 8 minutes. And now here they are. Where's the irony? It's a full moon, my first thought was the moon, my last thought (outside) was the moon. Tonight I bought a bottle of wine - before I noticed the moon outside at all. I decided to try something different. I bought "Luna Di Luna" (moon moon).